I woke up with a stiff dick. I was dreaming about kids, we were playing together, they were laughing and I was very happy. The fact that I had a hard in that moment is crucial: at 5 am the pure unadulterated Yang energy expresses itself. This is the moment that meditator use for their morning practice; priest for their prayers; and I to make love, when I can. If this energy is strong in you, you will wake up with an engorged sex. Those kids, the one from the dream, were from my infancy, and other kids I met later in my life. Yang energy is also fatherly energy, and this morning this is what was being expressed through me. Does this tells me that I am finally ready to be a Dad? I felt I was ready long time ago. But maybe now, not only my mind and my body are ready, but my energy too.
Then I thought about Aisha and something inside went ‘click’. When I met Aisha I was 30 and she was 22, about. I fell in love immediately. I have to admit that I am very clumsy. In gaming, at least. I also have a hard time in keeping secrets; especially with women. So it is no surprise that she understood my interest right away. Call it female intuition, the flowers were a big hint too. Now I would not act in the same way. But at the time I was specialising in sweeping a girl from her feet. And to succeed you need to be direct and terrible in a terrific sort of way.
Many people think of me as a womaniser, and while this is flattering, it is far from true. I am way too clumsy, and an underachiever for that. I had 15 women in 15 years of honourable service. About one a year. At the time Aisha had a partner. An old story in its latest stage. When I met her again she had another partner, a young story in its infancy, and I felt betrayed. How silly of me! But I am not here to speak about my clumsy silliness, but about how, if at the time I was less clumsy, if she were a bit wiser in seeing the potentiality that was there… then those dreams about kids might have been a reality.
Click!
How incredibly silly for our society to link Gaming ability with the right to procreate and to father the next generation.
